SCENE 5: A HALL IN CAPULET'S HOUSE.

[Musicians waiting. Enter Servingmen with napkins]

FIRST SERVANT

Where's Potpan, that he helps not to take away? He

Where’s that servant, Potpan? Isn’t he helping clear the tables?

shift a trencher? He scrape a trencher!

Has he moved a wooden plate? He should be scraping them!

SECOND SERVANT

When good manners shall lie all in one or two men's

When there are only one or two men with good manners –

hands and they unwashed too, 'tis a foul thing.

and even they have dirty hands – that isn’t good.

FIRST SERVANT

Away with the joint-stools, remove the

Remove the wooden stools, take out the

court-cupboard, look to the plate. Good thou, save

sideboards, and clear away the plates. Good man, save

me a piece of marchpane; and, as thou lovest me, let

me a slice of marzipan; and out of love for me, have

the porter let in Susan Grindstone and Nell.

Antony, and Potpan!

SECOND SERVANT

Ay, boy, ready.

Yes, boy, I’m ready.

FIRST SERVANT

You are looked for and called for, asked for and

sought for, in the great chamber.

sought for, in the great room.

SECOND SERVANT

We cannot be here and there too. Cheerly, boys;

We can’t be here and there at the same time. Smile, boys;

be brisk awhile, and the longer liver take all.

work quickly now, for whoever lives longest gets everything.

[Enter CAPULET, with JULIET and others of his house, meeting the Guests and Maskers]

CAPULET

Welcome, gentlemen! Ladies that have their toes

Welcome, gentlemen! Those ladies who have toes

Unplagued with corns will have a bout with you.

That aren’t covered in corns will dance with you.

Ah ha, my mistresses! Which of you all

Ah ha, my mistresses! Which ones of you

Will now deny to dance? She that makes dainty,

Will now decline to dance? If you are shy, girls,

She, I'll swear, hath corns; am I come near ye now?

I’ll swear that you have corns! Well, am I right?

Welcome, gentlemen! I have seen the day

Welcome, gentlemen! There was a time

That I have worn a visor and could tell

When I could wear a mask and I could whisper

A whispering tale in a fair lady's ear,

A tale into a lovely lady’s ear,

Such as would please: 'tis gone, 'tis gone, 'tis gone:

To chat her up; but now those days are gone.

You are welcome, gentlemen! Come, musicians, play.

A hall, a hall! Give room! And foot it, girls.

A hall, a hall! Make room! And start to dance, girls.

[Music plays, and they dance]

More light, you knaves; and turn the tables up,

Hey servants, make more light; remove the tables,

And quench the fire, the room is grown too hot.

And quench the fire; the room has got too hot.

Ah, sirrah, this unlooked-for sport comes well.

Ah, friend, this unexpected fun is welcome.

Nay, sit, nay, sit, good cousin Capulet;

No, sit you down, good cousin Capulet;

For you and I are past our dancing days:

For you and I are far too old to dance:

How long is't now since last yourself and I

How long has it now been since you and I

Were in a mask?

Have worn a mask?

SECOND CAPULET

By'r lady, thirty years.

Good lord, it’s thirty years.

CAPULET

What, man! 'Tis not so much, 'tis not so much:

What, man! It’s not that long, it’s not that long:

'Tis since the nuptials of Lucentio,

The last time was the wedding of Lucentio;

Come pentecost as quickly as it will,

At Pentecost, which will be with us soon,

Some five and twenty years; and then we masked.

It’s twenty five years; that’s when we both wore masks.

SECOND CAPULET

'Tis more, 'tis more, his son is elder, sir;

It’s more than that; his son is older, sir;

His son is thirty.

CAPULET

Will you tell me that?

Are you sure of that?

His son was but a ward two years ago.

His son was still a child two years ago.

ROMEO

[To a Servingman]

What lady is that, which doth enrich the hand

Who is that lady, who enriches the hand

Of yonder knight?

Of that knight over there?

SERVANT

I know not, sir.

I do not know, sir.

ROMEO

O, she doth teach the torches to burn bright!

Oh, she does teach the torches to burn bright!

It seems she hangs upon the cheek of night

It’s though she’s hanging in the dark of night

Like a rich jewel in an Ethiope's ear;

Like gemstone earrings worn by someone black,

Beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear!

So richly fine, the earth can’t pay it back!

So shows a snowy dove trooping with crows,

Much like a dove, all white, amongst some crows,

As yonder lady o'er her fellows shows.

Beside those ladies, that is how she shows.

The measure done, I'll watch her place of stand,

When she has finished dancing, I will stand

And, touching hers, make blessed my rude hand.

And touch her, thereby blessing my foul hand.

Did my heart love till now? Forswear it, sight!

Has my heart ever loved? My lying sight!

For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night.

For I’ve not seen true beauty till tonight.

TYBALT

This, by his voice, should be a Montague.

This voice shows this man is a Montague.

Fetch me my rapier, boy. What dares the slave

Fetch me my sword, boy. How can this fool dare

Come hither, covered with an antic face,

Come here, disguised by an old-fashioned mask

To fleer and scorn at our solemnity?

To grin and mock our solemn get-together?

Now, by the stock and honour of my kin,

Now, by my family’s honour, held so strong,

To strike him dead, I hold it not a sin.

I’ll strike him dead, and won’t think it is wrong.

CAPULET

Why, how now, kinsman! Wherefore storm you so?

Hi, cousin! What has made your anger grow?

TYBALT

Uncle, this is a Montague, our foe,

A villain that is hither come in spite,

A villain who has come here out of spite

To scorn at our solemnity this night.

To mock our solemn party here tonight.

CAPULET

Young Romeo is it?

Is that young Romeo?

TYBALT

'Tis he, that villain Romeo.

It’s him, that villain Romeo.

CAPULET

Content thee, gentle coz, let him alone;

Calm down now, gentle cousin, leave him be;

He bears him like a portly gentleman;

He holds himself with dignity and manners;

And, to say truth, Verona brags of him

And, if I speak the truth, he is well thought of

To be a virtuous and well-governed youth:

Here in Verona as a decent youth.

I would not for the wealth of all the town

I would not – even for all the wealth in town –

Here in my house do him disparagement:

Have him be treated badly in my house:

Therefore be patient, take no note of him:

And so, be patient; take no notice of him.

It is my will, the which if thou respect,

That’s what I want; if you respect my wishes,

Show a fair presence and put off these frowns,

You’ll wear a happy face and stop your frowning,

And ill-beseeming semblance for a feast.

For that is inappropriate at a party.

TYBALT

It fits, when such a villain is a guest:

It is when we have villains as our guest:

I'll not endure him.

I will not tolerate him.

CAPULET

He shall be endured:

Yes, you will.

What, goodman boy! I say, he shall: go to;

What, cheeky chap! I’ve said so, so go do it.

Am I the master here, or you? Go to.

Am I the master here, or you? Go do it.

You'll not endure him! God shall mend my soul!

You will not tolerate him? Ah, God bless me!

You'll make a mutiny among my guests!

You’ll start a fight, disrupting all my guests?

You will set cock-a-hoop! You'll be the man!

You’ll crow just like a cockerel? Oh, you’re brave!

TYBALT

Why, uncle, 'tis a shame.

But, uncle, it’s insulting.

CAPULET

Go to, go to;

Clear off;

You are a saucy boy: is't so, indeed?

You’re insolent and cocky, aren’t you boy?

This trick may chance to scathe you, I know what:

These traits will come to hurt you, I am sure:

You must contrary me! Marry, 'tis time.

You challenge me? It’s time you learnt your lesson.

Well said, my hearts! You are a princox; go:

Dear guests, good health! You upstart crow; clear off.

Be quiet, or--More light, more light! For shame!

Be quiet, or – Turn up the lights! – or sadly,

I'll make you quiet. What, cheerly, my hearts!

I’ll shut you up. Such happiness, dear guests!

TYBALT

Patience perforce with wilful choler meeting

Through force, I must be patient, though I’m raging;

Makes my flesh tremble in their different greeting.

I’m trembling as emotions are engaging.

I will withdraw: but this intrusion shall

I will withdraw; though Romeo’s intrusion

Now seeming sweet convert to bitter gall.

Seems sweet now, he’ll regret it in conclusion.

[Exit]

ROMEO

[To JULIET]

If I profane with my unworthiest hand

If I upset you with my calloused hand

This holy shrine, the gentle fine is this:

By holding yours in mine, the fine is this:

My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand

My lips, like blushing pilgrims, ready stand

To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.

To smooth my rough hands with a tender kiss.

JULIET

Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much,

Good pilgrim, do not blame your hands so much;

Which mannerly devotion shows in this;

You show devotion holding me like this;

For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch,

For saints have hands that pilgrims’ hands do touch,

And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.

And holding hands is like a holy kiss.

ROMEO

Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?

Don’t saints have lips, and holy fingers too?

JULIET

Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.

Yes, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.

ROMEO

O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do;

Oh, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do;

They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.

They touch to pray; do this, else I’ll despair.

JULIET

Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake.

Saints do not move, but prayers they respect;

ROMEO

Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take.

Then do not move; let my prayer’s take effect.

Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged.

Thus from my lips to yours, my sins are lifted.

JULIET

Then have my lips the sin that they have took.

Then now my lips hold sins that yours are missing.

ROMEO

Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged!

Sins from your lips? That sin is sweetly gifted!

Give me my sin again.

Give me that sin again.

JULIET

You kiss by the book.

You’ve studied kissing.

NURSE

Madam, your mother craves a word with you.

Madam, your mother wants a word with you.

ROMEO

What is her mother?

Who is her mother?

NURSE

Marry, bachelor,

Listen here, young man,

Her mother is the lady of the house,

And a good lady, and a wise and virtuous.

And a good lady, wise and virtuous.

I nursed her daughter, that you talked withal;

I nursed her daughter; that’s who you just talked to.

I tell you, he that can lay hold of her

I tell you that man who wins her heart

Shall have the chinks.

Inherits cash.

ROMEO

Is she a Capulet?

O dear account! My life is my foe's debt.

I’ve fallen for my foe – I’m so upset!

BENVOLIO

Away, begone; the sport is at the best.

Come on, let’s go; let’s quit whilst we’re ahead.

ROMEO

Ay, so I fear; the more is my unrest.

You’re right, before it messes with my head.

CAPULET

Nay, gentlemen, prepare not to be gone;

No, gentlemen, don’t prep yourselves to leave;

We have a trifling foolish banquet towards.

We have some little nibbles on the way.

Is it e'en so? Why, then, I thank you all.

Can that be true? Well, then, I thank you all.

I thank you, honest gentlemen; good night.

More torches here! Come on then, let's to bed.

Bring torches here! Come on, let’s go to bed.

Ah, sirrah, by my fay, it waxes late:

Hey, servant, let me tell you it is late;

I'll to my rest.

It’s time for bed for me.

[Exeunt all but JULIET and Nurse]

JULIET

Come hither, nurse. What is yond gentleman?

Come here now, nurse. Who’s that man over there?

NURSE

The son and heir of old Tiberio.

JULIET

What's he that now is going out of door?

Who’s that who’s going out the door right now?

NURSE

Marry, that, I think, be young Petrucio.

That one, I think, is young Petrucio.

JULIET

What's he that follows there, that would not dance?

Who’s that who’s following? He wouldn’t dance.

NURSE

I know not.

I do not know.

JULIET

Go ask his name: if he be married.

Go ask his name. If he’s already married,

My grave is like to be my wedding bed.

I’ll never wed, till to my grave I’m carried.

NURSE

His name is Romeo, and a Montague;

His name is Romeo, a Montague;

The only son of your great enemy.

JULIET

My only love sprung from my only hate!

The man I love’s the son of whom I hate!

Too early seen unknown, and known too late!

I didn’t know at first, but learnt too late!

Prodigious birth of love it is to me,

What awful luck the one I love is born

That I must love a loathed enemy.

To one we hate, an enemy forsworn.

NURSE

What's this? What's this?

You what? You what?

JULIET

A rhyme I learned even now

A rhyme I have just learned

Of one I danced withal.

From someone I just danced with.

[One calls within 'Juliet.']

NURSE

Anon, anon!

Come! Anon!

Come, let's away; the strangers all are gone.

Let’s leave, for all the strangers now have gone.

[Exeunt]